Wintertime

the cold

the snow

the lack of sunshine

the bitterness

it all kills me

more and more

little by little

every passing day

and no amount of
The Big Bang Theory

helps.

today,

While coming back from work I saw an adorable doggy almost get hit, and my mind flashed back to Chance.

Chance is a dog we rescued and adopted after seeing him get hit by a vehicle. Hence, his name, Chance, our second chance baby. :)

So I immediately tell my mother to pull over to the side of the road, and she does without argument, I then go into "track team" mode. I ran after the doggy as if my life depended on it. And while running to him he almost got hit by 3, yes THREE, more drivers. He finally made it to me. We finally made it back to my car.

And long story, shorter, without the help of the shelter we found his owners and name.

His name is Bentley.

And he shall be our baby until his owners come to get him tomorrow night. Sadly, we could not find his current owner, and so he is being taken in by the family that put him up for adoption as a puppy. I'm sad, because he brings back a lot of memories of my old baby Sadie Blue. I would keep Bentley in a heartbeat.

Tomorrow, I will definitely be crying.

Tonight, I could be crying to.

For you see, I just found out a certain ex is back to shooting up heroin. It crushed me to find out. This boy just can't grow up. He had so much potential and he lost it. I am stuck between a sick feeling, anger, and extreme sadness. They are crushing down on me.

So for anyone who is reading this:

There is a 20% chance of recovery from Opiate addiction. Just don't start. :(

Day Old Hate.

Thank You Dear Kind Sir.

Tumblr, a beautiful place, full of beautiful people.

well... some beautiful people.

A place where I was told the following: "You resemble Elizabeth Anne Caplan."

which lead me to google the shit out of the name.

Me: "OMG! The actress from Mean Girls?!"

I am quite pleased with this. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You.

healed.

Besides some needed touch-ups my tattoo is fully finished and healed.

It is inspiration for the mental and emotional parts of myself.

today,

I have chosen to emotionally eat again.

when life hands you lemons, eat the lemons.

:.vous renouveler.:

Renewing ourselves isn't always the easiest thing. I am a person who is always on the journey of renewal.

Without focusing on just physical aspects of a renewal, here are some ideas that I have found help me feel better.

-find alone time occasionally

-read a book

-go on a walk

-write

-meditate

-watch a movie that makes you cry

-watch a movie that makes you laugh

-compliment yourself (this can be really hard for some people; moi included)

Remember, if you can't love yourself how can you expect to find someone else who truly loves you?

Fools Like Me.

125

I want those thighs back right this second.

Realization,

I've spent a lot of time lately feeling bad for myself, it seems like I spend a lot of time doing that.

I've forgotten to mention the good.

I was hired as a Teacher's Aide at an elementary school. Anyone that really knows me, also knows that I have been applying for this kind of position for yearrrrrrs. While it is only 1 hour and 15 minutes a day, it is the best 1 hour and 15 minutes I've had in a while. Children can heal even the darkest of hearts... until they turn into a pre-teen. BUT I'm lucky enough to work with kindergartners and first graders. :) They are THE cutest little beings ever.

I also have an interview, hopefully, coming up as an Aide at a Jr. High. *fingers crossed* I really, really hope that I can get both of these jobs going.

therapeutic laughs.

Life is ours,

never forget that.

I've spent the last few days in limbo of moping and angry feelings; all while wondering if I did the right thing.

Today, I'm happy. I know I did the right thing. And I will continue to do so.

Followers, on October 30th I was fired from my job. For what? For sticking up for myself. Yes, I did choose to use a "naughty word", but even after that I continued to do the right thing, by apologizing to the very person that had been hurting me for months.

We often forget that we all have the right to be treated fairly and nicely. It is the right of being human.

I will continue to fight for not only my rights, but the rights of the workers left behind.

Oh, and today, I shall be dining at Chuck-A-Rama.