addictions.

You hear of people being addicted to cigarettes, alcohol, getting that high...

but no one ever mentions the addiction to feeling wanted.

It has hit me today, as I'm reading a book on addiction, that I have a problem with that.

Not only will I always want to turn to alcohol for relief. I'm going to always feel like I need that "PROOF" that I'm wanted in the world. But just so every girl can find hope...

you do NOT need to give yourself to a male to be "wanted".

I am aware that I am going to have many struggles to overcome. And maybe I'm a stupid head for piling them all on so close to each other... but here is my promise to not only the world, but myself:

"I will not let depression, alcohol, and sex destroy me. I will prove to my family, friends, and myself that I have a reason to be here, that I have a reason to be at my best, and that I have a reason to go on, healthily."

I thank the random people that have popped into my life as of lately, surprisingly I've become friends with some Mormons. Ahhhhh, crazy I know. They have given me a look at what I would like to achieve. Not so much because they are Mormons, but because they have goals. These 3 girls do not know what they have brought me to feel. I just wish I could bring them to fully understand that I will be forever grateful for just meeting them, talking to them, and hearing their life stories. You can be a girl that makes bad decisions and still turns her life around. You can be a girl that follows her beliefs until she meets that ONE guy that she gives everything too. You can be religious while still being accepting. You can have hope in something better even when you've been cursed with a broken heart. (that WILL heal by the way.) We all just need time. Time; be patient ya'll.

Strength. I have it. I'm going to use it. Saying goodbye to those that will get me no where, saying goodbye to those that have gotten me no where, and saying hello to a new today.